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Have been in an uncharacteristic right royal funk of late. Maybe its my poor subjugated creative soul crying out for an outlet, or maybe it's just that I happen to be an idiot magnet.
Whatever the case may be, I apologize for not posting for so long.......but give me a few more days while I straighten some people.....erm..things ;) out, and I'll be on the blogging wagon again.
Thanks for putting up with me!!
Arrghh!! The next sorry excuse for a human being who asks me this question is going to get smacked upside their head(s).
Some evil force of nature deigned that I would remain indoors due to the heavy rains for a week (which seems like a month). I decided to get out of my underground lair and step out into the sunshine here in Bombay.
And every.where.I.went there were people asking me "What are you doing here??". Not random people ofcourse(coz that would be weird, in addition to being silly), but people I know.
At the museum and the art gallery, at the movies and at restaurants......that's what people say when they randomly bump into you.
What would you expect me to do in a restaurant/theatre/art gallery??? Scout the place on behalf of terrorists outfits?? Smash the place with a bat demanding they change all the signs BACK to "Bombay"???
Argh people!!!!
How bout you learn some NEW opening lines?? Like, "Oh how nice to see you here!" or "Its so nice you're here, let's catch up" or even "Oh so you're here......are you done stealing my boyfriend??"....lol
*Sigh* , but it's not meant to be. Let's start a brigade. The anti "Hi! What are you doing here?"(HWAYDH) brigade and swear that the next person who says that will get the icy stare of death!!! :P
So , what are you doing here ?
Today's papers were filled with news of the couple from Bhayander (Bombay) who moved the court, so that they could abort their 24 week old foetus. They are doing this, since abortion after 20 weeks is illegal in India, and the baby had some sort of heart blockage/cardiac problem.
So basically, the pro-life/pro-choice war that has been raging in the USA and other countries for years has finally touched Indian shores.
As a woman, I am firmly in the pro-choice camp. Irrespective of the fact that it is my body, and therefore mine to do whatever suits me (whether it is keeping the baby or not), no courts can decide whether I am in a position to be a fit mother, emotionally or financially. It's amazing how the pro-life brigade is only bothered about whether the baby is born or not, and is in no way concerned about the quality of life of the baby or the family.
Kudos to the couple to decided against going into some clinic in a dark alley, and having the courage to go the legal way, even though this might wreck irreparable damage on their image, not to mention the psyche of the child once she is old enough to realise that she wasn't wanted.
Unfortunately, the courts in their infinite knowledge decided that they know what is better for us than we do and decided not to let them go ahead with the abortion.This verdict may effectively have either forced them into penury, forced them into having a child and then giving it up for adoption or forcing a child to grow up with absolutely no quality of life.
In a country where the population problem is threating our progress, I think this is a very very stupid move. Instead of it being a landmark verdict, where the abortion cut-off was raised to 24 weeks, they have basically given a subliminal nod to the populace to go ahead and keep trying.
And we all know, this is the last thing we need. This is one area in which I wish we DON'T over-take China.
The saffron brigade has done it again, Monday's Economic Times reported that the Sena has managed to rope in food-giant McDonalds to sponsor a convention of prospective 'Shiv Vadapav' vendors in Mumbai.
Before you jump the gun let me state that I have nothing against the corporatization of this city's much beloved carbohydrate-bomb, Jumbo King got there first remember? All I'm asking is would the vada pav taste less delicious without the 'Shiv' prefix? I mean common! You've already renamed the airport, railway station, and museum, can't we at least refrain from unleashing politics on to the poor man's stomach. ET describes it 'the culinary dimensions of politics'
Sure George Wittet the man who designed Gateway of India, the Prince of Wales Museum, the Indian Institute of Science and Ballard Estate must've rolled in his grave when Wittet Street in Fort was renamed as Walchand Hirachand Marg. But hell he had no right to argue for starters he was dead, and secondly and more importantly he was a Britisher. But what did the Vada Pav do to deserve its fate. I'm sure a Happy Meal comprising Shiv waran Bhath and Shiv kokum Kadi are in the pipeline.
I'm not an elitist anti- Marathi which I'm sure ill be accused of by the end of this article all I'm saying is; pause, before you obliterate the history of this city.
The situation is so bad that I recently spotted an irate tourist at Pydhonie junction jumping over his copy of Lonely Planet. When a street overflowing with locals can't help you find an address it sure is a "lonely planet". I'm surprised the editors of this travel magazine haven't initiated a lawsuit for its losses running into billions thanks to BMC's naam Karan bug. If you think only streets, junctions, and chowks that are renamed then you're wrong, the good ol' footpath hasn't been spared either. The footpath opposite Wilson College at Chowpaty is called Khote footpath.
Rumor has it, running out of things to rename the BMC is considering initiating a proposal to name the street lamps of this city. Don't be surprised if you spot a lamp post with the name Shri Ujaala Marg or something.
Thankfully the people of this city have trouble catching up with the times, do you ever hear people say that they're going for a stroll on Netaji Subhash Bose Road (Marine Drive)? Since when did rechristening roads, becomes a benchmark of patriotism?
I believe that every time you rename something, you willfully chip away it's history, disrespect it heroes and their contribution to make this city what it is. Apart from the ethical and practical dilemmas about renaming anything and everything, isn't it odd that Mumbai -this glorious city has only one hero? What? Did you say JRD Tata? Nonsense! Like the tooth-fairy and unicorn he was a mythical creature made up by some ageing Parsi to tell his grandchildren at bedtime.
Before you jump the gun let me state that I have nothing against the corporatization of this city's much beloved carbohydrate-bomb, Jumbo King got there first remember? All I'm asking is would the vada pav taste less delicious without the 'Shiv' prefix? I mean common! You've already renamed the airport, railway station, and museum, can't we at least refrain from unleashing politics on to the poor man's stomach. ET describes it 'the culinary dimensions of politics'
Sure George Wittet the man who designed Gateway of India, the Prince of Wales Museum, the Indian Institute of Science and Ballard Estate must've rolled in his grave when Wittet Street in Fort was renamed as Walchand Hirachand Marg. But hell he had no right to argue for starters he was dead, and secondly and more importantly he was a Britisher. But what did the Vada Pav do to deserve its fate. I'm sure a Happy Meal comprising Shiv waran Bhath and Shiv kokum Kadi are in the pipeline.
I'm not an elitist anti- Marathi which I'm sure ill be accused of by the end of this article all I'm saying is; pause, before you obliterate the history of this city.
The situation is so bad that I recently spotted an irate tourist at Pydhonie junction jumping over his copy of Lonely Planet. When a street overflowing with locals can't help you find an address it sure is a "lonely planet". I'm surprised the editors of this travel magazine haven't initiated a lawsuit for its losses running into billions thanks to BMC's naam Karan bug. If you think only streets, junctions, and chowks that are renamed then you're wrong, the good ol' footpath hasn't been spared either. The footpath opposite Wilson College at Chowpaty is called Khote footpath.
Rumor has it, running out of things to rename the BMC is considering initiating a proposal to name the street lamps of this city. Don't be surprised if you spot a lamp post with the name Shri Ujaala Marg or something.
Thankfully the people of this city have trouble catching up with the times, do you ever hear people say that they're going for a stroll on Netaji Subhash Bose Road (Marine Drive)? Since when did rechristening roads, becomes a benchmark of patriotism?
I believe that every time you rename something, you willfully chip away it's history, disrespect it heroes and their contribution to make this city what it is. Apart from the ethical and practical dilemmas about renaming anything and everything, isn't it odd that Mumbai -this glorious city has only one hero? What? Did you say JRD Tata? Nonsense! Like the tooth-fairy and unicorn he was a mythical creature made up by some ageing Parsi to tell his grandchildren at bedtime.
I consider myself to be a fairly level headed person (except on full moon nights). I didn't think that I could be celebrity struck, but I was out celebrating Friendship Day with Shamim and we came across Manav Gohil and his wife Shweta.
Now granted he doesn't have your quintessential chocolate boy looks (I dont like that sort anyway, Shahid Kapoor being the brand ambassador of that "sort"). But he's got dimples, is tall and has a face to die for! What's not to love?? :). He also looks like a "thinker" so thats just the cherry on the cake!
We circled him four times with our arms laden with random stuff (because we were too lazy/short-sighted to get a trolley and we ended up buying armloads of stuff!). I have honestly never stared drooling and slack-awed at another human being (being an expert in the art of "checking out" without appearing to be checking out!) and they almost called in house-keeping to scrape our jaws (and our drool) off the floor. I am now officially one step closer to marrying him.
On a side (and completely bias free) note, I'm happy to report that his wife has horrible skin and has done this weird and terrible dye job on her hair, which aimed for red but fell short and landed smack dab in maroon. Wheee!!! :) Ok bitchiness over!!
Sigh! I heart Manav Gohil.
Pic from here
Today is Friendship Day (Happy Friendship Day Y'all!) and once again I realise how truly blessed I am, to have the people that I have in my life.
After years of moochers and hypocrites, back-stabbers and fair-weather friends, my current posse is nothing short of manna from heaven!
I used to think I have a lot of friends, but now I realise I just have a few, the rest are acquaintences at best. But the ones that I do consider friends are the ones who I will give my life for and vice versa (hopefully). We've had our ups and downs, our fights and periods of ignoring each others existence (don't ask, long story), but we've managed to pull through and emerged stronger.
My friends add zing to my life and tell me things no other human would dare (at peril of their own lives lol). I feel wealthy in the knowledge that these guys have got my back. And most importantly, they not only put up with my madness, but also complement it. I can be my crazy, moody, talkative, bawdy, zany, muti-faceted self!! So thank you, you know who you are, and you mean more to me than you will ever realise!! :)
Ever noticed how anybody or rather anything can turn in to a celebrity? Yup the latest to join the boob-tube infamy is the monsoon in Mumbai. Never before have you seen hours of news -coverage dedicated to reporting the errant ways of the monsoon In my opinion only Britney Spears can match up to the dysfunctional and inexplicable behavior of the rains in Mumbai.
After promising this city an early and normal monsoon with a few spells of rain in June, the monsoon did a Houdini act, disappearing for nearly two whole months; almost single handedly hurtling the inflation rate to the 12% mark. Sure crude oil prices was made the fall-guy but it was the fear of a drought that sky – rocketed all other prices. Just when you had given up all hope and actually refrained from switching channels while watching Al Gore's An Inconvenient Truth, the skies opened up and hell it rained! And rained, and rained and rained, yes incessant rainfall for four days.
Which brings us back to where I started this article, news coverage of the monsoon in Mumbai Absolutely unbelievable? Flip through the dozen odd news channels and you'll spot a 20 something female, standing in knee –deep water on the streets reporting about the rainfall. Of course you'll have a super or ads where news channels show clippings of their reporter with her hair plastered to her head getting drenched in the rain, and say "we do whatever it takes, to bring you the whole truth" Umm really? Because common-sense would dictate that all they had to do was to hand the poor thing an umbrella or maybe a raincoat, seriously none of us would've grudged her for being an elite journalism grad from JNU had she stood with an umbrella. While the journalist yells her lungs out how water levels are rising dangerously and entering the homes of slum-dwellers all of sudden you'll have some guy show up behind her and wave gleefully to the camera as his friends try surfing on someone's makeshift roof that's just been blown away by the wind. (You gotta love this city J )
Then there's the BREAKING NEWS phenomenon, let me tell you something, every millimeter increase in rainfall reported by the MET is not breaking news!!! The only thing that's 'breaking news' is if you tell me, Milan subway is not water –logged, rail services aren't disrupted, and traffic hasn't come to a grinding halt, that BMC is actually prepared for the rains. But hey maybe they are on to something big here, instead of upgrading our British legacy drainage system or clearing up the Mithi river all those funds are directed towards purchasing boats. The truth be told, these guys are visionaries, I did some research and found out that holiday-resort owners in Hrishikesh and Dandeli fear that they may loose business as Mumbai may become the next destination for river-rafting and canoeing during June to September, The latest buzz is that the second season of Khatron ke Khiladi (Indian Fear Factor) is being shot outside Andheri station, if you can make it back home without falling into an open manhole then you da man!!!
Ever wondered how all the technology in the world falls short at protecting you from getting drenched? If you can hold an umbrella without it overturning at Marine Drive, Nariman Point or Worli sea face during heavy rains I'll give you a thousand bucks period. All this talk of rain, jogged my memory back to my college days where we studied this chapter in Hindi literature about some guy who wrote a 2000 word essay on the predicament of the different ways of holding an umbrella. By the end of it I had only one suggestion to offer the guy, 'shove it!' (If anyone remembers either the name or the author please do write in)
Of course not all is bad, the rains bring much needed relief to this city, washing away dirt, grime and its sins all at one go. The water supply of the city depends on the rains and honestly it is best time to be in the city. Nothing can be more exhilarating than finding out your office is shut and that you have an off or reaching school only to be told at the gate that you should return home. But rather than enjoying my cup of coffee or roasted corn at marine drive I find myself flinging my remote at my Tata Sky set top box which looses transmission at the slightest hint of a drizzle, you see when visibility is only 50 meters its hard to spot the silver lining.
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